The Grinning Beast: Crocotta

So picture this. You're alone, wandering through a forest in India or Africa. It's probably night time, everything scary happens at night. You hear a sound, it's like a scream mixed with a laugh, but it has words attached. 'Come closer, hello, come closer,' Yeah, if you hear that. Run. Fuck the voice. Run.

That my friends is a Crocotta or Leucrota, a mouth full of teeth that will talk your way to death. A Crocotta is dog like creature from Ethiopia or India born from breeding a lion and hyena, that is not to be messed with.

The creature is described to have the build of a hyena and a lion, as big as a donkey, cloven hooves and a lions tail. It is also said to have multi-coloured eyes that are made from striped gems that give them oracular powers. However, the feature that best identifies a Crocotta is its grin. This beast stole the Joker's look and has a grin that stretches across itS face, but instead of teeth it has solid bone that look like daggers.

If the look of this creature frightens you, then its abilities will make you shit your pants. It is said to be swift, one of the swiftest animals in the land. It can not be killed by any weapon made from steel. However, these aren't its best assets. The Crocotta has the ability to mimic the human voice. It lures people out of their homes by calling out to them, sometimes pretending to be loved ones, before killing the person. So next time your mom calls you downstairs, make sure its her.

And we're not the only ones in danger. Man's best friend is an enemy of the Crocotta. If its shadow falls upon upon a pooch, then the animal will be rendered useless. Also, if any animal, especially dogs, spots a Crocotta three times, it will freeze so the beast can eat it. So keep your pets away from these beasts.

In modern day, the beast is is closely linked to the hyena. The spotted hyena (Crocuta crocuta) bares resemblance in both name and looks. The spotted hyena has large jaws that can bite through bone, powerfully strong and can make humanized sounds like laughter. Local folktale often depicts hyenas has being bisexual and able to change their gender, shape-shift and process the human voice. The stripped hyena is also a favourite for being the modern Crocotta with it's stripped coat and human like scream.

So next time you hear someone shout your name, watch out, there may be a Crocotta about.

External links

http://bestiary.ca/beasts/beast160.htm

http://victorguerr.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/leucrota.html

The Faithful Hound: Gelert

Laika, the first dog in space.

We love dogs. Throughout history, dog and man have always been side by side. From the ancient Egyptian  god Anubis to Russia's race to space, dogs have shared out history. The Welsh also have their tales of courageous hounds, but like so many stories involving man's best friend, tissues are required.

Now grab some popcorn, tissues and a blanket, it's time for a story.

In the mountains of Gwynedd, North-West Wales, lived Prince Llewelyn The Great and his faithful wolf-hound, Gelert. Together they hunted, no game too big or too strong for Llewelyn's favourite hound. The hound was often described having bravery that knew no bounds.

The Prince also had a son who he cherished dearly as he was the last token from his wife, who had perished during childbirth. He promised to care for their child and never let anything happen to him. He entrusted his safety to Gelert, knowing the hound would never harm his heir.

One day, Prince Llewelyn and his men were out hunting with their many hounds, when the Prince realised that his loyal Gelert was no where to be seen. They continued the hunt and returned late at night. Llewelyn worried for his dog as the forest was plagued with wolves and bears, but was eager to retire with his son after a tiring day.

Although, what met the Prince's gaze left him rooted to the spot. Upon entering the nursery, the furniture had been tossed, tapestries ripped from their curtains and the cradle upturned and empty, smothered in blood. A wet muzzle nudged into the Prince's hand. He looked down and saw his ever so faithful hound, exhausted, slowly wagging his tail, happy to see his master's return. However, his face and paws were soaked in blood.

The Prince, in horror and disbelief, cried out and plunged his sword into hound's side, thinking that his dog had murdered his son. Gelert howled as he slumped to the ground, awakening the baby who lay hidden beneath blankets. Llewelyn searched for his son and found the babe unharmed. Upon finding him, he saw a body of a wolf that had been slain by Gelert beneath the cradle.

Piecing together what had happened, Llewelyn knelt by his dying hound, filled with remorse, stroked Gelert until he died in his master's arms. The Prince buried Gelert outside his castle, with huge celebration, but he could not join as the cries of his hound plagued him, and he vowed never to smile again.

There are many debates on whether the tale is true or fiction. But the gravestone of Gelert, engraved with the name, Beddgelert, can been found today in the village of the same name up in the mountains of North Wales.

“In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money can not buy... to wit the wag of a dog's tail...”- Josh Billings

External Links

http://myths.e2bn.org/mythsandlegends/playstory760-the-story-of-gelert.html

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/wales/posts/The-legend-of-Gelert

The Welsh Pony: The Ceffyl Dŵr

The Ceffyl Dŵr. Never heard of it? Don't know how to pronounce it? Well, let me teach you a thing.

The Ceffyl Dŵr (Keff-ill dwr) is a shape shifting water horse that dwells in the lakes from Welsh Mythology. You may have heard of its bro, the Scottish Keplie. You know the one, the horse that lets people ride it and then drowns them. Yep, that's him. Well, the Ceffyl Dŵr is its less popular, a tad nicer cousin.

Now according to what part of Wales you are from, the Ceffyl Dŵr looks a little different. 

The North describe it as this terrible being with fiery eyes with an evil aura. Where the South (the best) describe it as a little bit cheeky to lone travellers, but also in a positive light with its beautiful wings. Or in reality, they probably don't give a shit and let the beast do what it wants. As long as it doesn't hurt the sheep, I'm sure it's fine.

Now when you see this beast, it may look like any other welsh cob (a breed of pony) wandering the valley ponds. However, upon close inspection, the pony is surrounded by mist that illuminates its grey coat. Though, it is very unlikely to see one, unless it is trying to kill you, as when it is seen, it will evaporate into mist, making it impossible to kill.

If you suffer from Equinophobia (the fear of horses), you probably don't want to read on. Like most water horses, the Ceffyl Dŵr isn't always friendly. The beast will hide in its pond, waiting for the wondering welsh man before ambushing him and trying to strangle him with its legs. Though, if it doesn't managed to kill you like that, it'll just do it the old fashioned way and trample you to death.

The Ceffyl Dŵr is also a bit of a flirt. If it sees a wary traveller, it will whine, buck and toss its head around, trying to gain the attention the unlucky person. Now if the person is tired, or has had some Tesco lasagne, they may try to mount the steed. Though,this is where it all goes wrong. The pony will ride up into the sky at frightening speeds, taking the person on an incredible pony ride, showing them wonder by wonder, before evaporating into mist, letting the person fall and die.

Now being a shape shifter, there are some whacked up stories. My favourite is the one about a man from the Rhondda (I wonder why?). Anyway, the dude was strolling along in Pontypridd, when all of a sudden the Ceffyl Dŵr in the form of a squirrel tried to strangle the man. Luckily for him, he survived the attack...but then died of a mysterious illness. I always thought the squirrels from Ponty looked shifty.

So next time you visit Wales, make sure you stay clear from ponies and squirrels. And probably sheep. You never know.

External links

http://www.celtnet.org.uk/miscellaneous/ceffyl_dwfr.html

http://www.celtnet.org.uk/miscellaneous/ceffyl_dwfr.html

http://howlinghorse.deviantart.com/art/Ceffyl-Dwr-Kelpie-198731883?offset=10

https://www.flickr.com/photos/38874442@N08/7316103554/in/photostream/

http://arrsistable.deviantart.com/art/Elemental-Water-73303556

The Japanese Vampire: The Kappa

If I say Vampire, you pretty much imagine a tall, pale guy with sharp, protruding fangs, that sometimes sparkles, right? Well, how about one that resembles your favourite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?

The Kappa is Japan's version of a vampire, but is generally believed to be a demon. Though, despite that, any being that takes anothers life force is considered a vampire. Which the Kappa certainly does do, but we'll move onto that later. First, how the little guy looks.

The Kappa's looks seem to change from region to region, each part of Japan trying to come up with an uglier version than the last place that painted him. He is often depicted as a small boy, that kinda looks like a turtle mashed your worst nightmares. He has yellowish-green scaly skin, a beaked mouth, a mini pond on his head ,and he reeks of fish. The Kappa is certainly no Edward Cullen in the looks department.

However, like his predatory cousins of the western folklore, that fishy smell doesn't deter the ladies from joining him for a swim. The Kappa is a bit of a prankster. One day he's that nice fellow who just lets off a laughing gas bomb, and the next he's drowning your wife.

So how is this ugly fellow a vampire? The simple answer is, he drinks his victim's blood... through their anus. Tasty. It is said to lure people into the water and wrestle them until they drown. Then once they are dead, he either drinks their blood, devours their liver or takes a person's Shirikodama, which is their soul that hides inside their butt, for power. Why the Japanese believe that there is a ball of power that resides in their anus, I do not know, but that is what the Kappa is after.

When he is not after your behind, he will sometimes drown your horses, kidnap people and rape women. Such a charmer. Sounds pretty much like any other vampire we know. However, just like how some vampires have to be invited inside your house, the Kappa can also be polite. If the Kappa is staring at you with its murderous turtle eyes, just bow at him and he has to bow back. And what does that do? Remember that pond on its head, well, when it bows, all the water spills out and the Kappa can not move unless it is refilled with water from its lake. Now if you don't run away screaming and help the poor thing out, it will forever be in your doubt.

Or if you want to be a bit more rambo with your approach, just rip off one of its arms. Apparently, it works. The legend goes, that a Kappa once tried to scare a cow by plunging its hand up its arse, but the joke was on him when the cow broke his arm in fright and ripped it clean off before running all the way home. The farmer obviously noticed an arm hanging from the cows behind and thought that wasn't right, and pulled it out. Then came along the Kappa begging for his arm back. The farmer agreed, only if the Kappa never molested anyone or any animal in town again. He agreed, grabbed his arm and made his way back home to his pond. However, the kappa was a little shit and invited another Kappa to do his handy-work for him and terrorise the village.

Aside from licking arse, the Kappa loves cucumbers. If you befriend a Kappa with a cucumber, he will bring you a fish, which is seen as good will. He'll also help with any task and give you secret medicine.So, he's not a total bad guy.

The Kappa is still believed in today, with many Japanese ponds having warning signs against him. However, there has been no sightings of the Kappa, so it's safe to go back in the water.

Now would you like to see a vampire movie featuring this guy, or another sparkling pretty boy?

External links:

http://mythology.wikia.com/wiki/Kappa

https://tokyo5.wordpress.com/tag/kappa/